'Tis a glorious day in the kingdom! Sun shining, birds singing, a hint of harvest magic wafting delicately though the air.
The Kingdom.Think I'll sleep til 2 in the afternoon, then sit around in my underwear for another hour.
Ah, that was infinitely pleasant. Now to venture into the out-of-doors.
Our benevolent Peruvian host knows of a fascinating medieval castle called Karlstejn, a lovely 30 minute drive into the country. Apparently, if you've seen one castle in Prague, you haven't seen them all.
So, we drive out to Karlstejn, and to our surprise, a rather lively wine festival called Karlštejnské Vinobraní is taking place around the castle grounds. For this, they unleash the burčák, a sweet young thang made from partially fermented grape juice.
Enjoyed by humans and yellow jackets alike, burčák is essentially unfinished wine for impatient peasants, and makes the perfect accompaniment to many other unfinished products, including and Guns N' Roses' "Chinese Democracy."
"Seriously, it's almost done!"It also goes great with hordes of folk in medieval garb, who appear to have fallen en masse through a tear in the space-time continuum and can't get enough modern-day cigarettes. It sort of breaks the mood, but hey, smoketh 'em if thou haveth 'em.
"You guys see the melons on that wench over yonder? Forsooth!"After touring the castle and taking in a performance, we deign to meander idly through the surrounding streets, whither poxy peasants hock more burčák, meats, cheeses and other touristy crap.
"Dude, it's fine, I'll just have an orange."I imbibe my share of burčák, down some delicious klobasa, and support the local economy by purchasing a sweet switch blade/torch lighter combo that may prove quite useful in the future, should I ever become a crackhead.
Oh, sure, I've got a light...
Smoking doesn't kill people. I do.On the drive home, we stop at a quarry, which I'm pretty sure the Czechs used to hurl potential witches into to see if they would use their demonic powers to fly away. Nice view.
Some purty rocks.Finally, after a veritable feast of royal burritos prepared by yours truly, it is time for this young noble to hang his frilly hat and retire for the evening. For the road ahead is long and fraught with peril.
Fare thee well, loyal subjects!
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